Lately I’ve done fuck all. I’ve sat on my arse, i’ve started getting fat again, i’ve talked about getting back out there of doing stuff, of building on this year. But so far its just been that, talk.
Until recently I couldn’t explain this malaise but as i’ve sat here and pondered why I haven’t moved on, its certainly dawned on me. I’ve already achieved more than I thought possible, and now I have to top that. Self esteem and confidence is not something I’ve had in spade, so i’ve never set large targets and goals for myself. In truth I think a large part of me never expected to pull off the achievements of the past year.
But I did. And now I know I have it in me to achieve things. And that scares me, as I don’t want to fail. So I think i’ve played it safe, i’ve sat around i’ve not done much, i’ve set small targets.
So now its time to figure out what I want to accomplish, set myself some goals for the next year. To push myself and aim to progress further. I don’t know if I will succeed, but one thing is for sure, I’ve more chance of doing it, than I have sitting on my arse getting fat.
So at this point I don’t know what those targets will be. It will be some weight loss, some getting fit, small goals. Then from there who knows, maybe some dumb crazy bike ride, or record breaking things for charity. I don’t know what all I know is I need to get out my head, enjoy myself and see what I can do.