Toughing it out…

I have a specific bike ride that I do alot, at it has a good mix of roads, hills, descents and corners. In 29.62 Miles it gives me a good mix of everything that I think the Land’s End to John O’Groats ride will throw at me.

Now some days I relish jumping on the bike and getting out there. Other days I don’t really want to. Sometimes I find the ride easy, other days its 29 miles of utter misery and i’m peddling, begging, dying to get home. Now today I would experience all of those emotions.

This morning I awoke pretty stressed. I have a feeling this week is going to be a big week for me, in terms of career, finances and fundraising. I awoke this morning worrying about all of this and feeling over awed by it. So I tried to do what I always do in this situation. Bottle it up, keep my problems to myself and muddle on, hoping the problems would solve themselves. I have a habit of being a miserable fucker when this happens. Thankfully for me, Em has the ability to read me like a book. However, as much I like myself to come across like a complex, deep character, to her i’m like a mills and boon novel; utterly predictable. Its one of the things I both hate and utterly love about her, she seems to know exactly what i’m thinking.  So like a dog determined to get some of your dinner she got the info out of me and did what she always did, supported me 100%. Why I try and hide things from her i’ll never know, as she always supports me, I really do not deserve her, but thankfully i have her on my side.

So after a few words of support and a solution to my stresses, she went off to work and i got on the bike.

Now before chatting with Em, i was dreading the bike ride but was eager to get out, as if i could outrun my problems. Now I was eager to get out on the road, and kick the ass out of this week! I know it will be a tough one, that it is potentially exciting, it may not come out exactly how i’d like, but thanks to Em i was ready to give it my all.

So I peddled away, each mile feeling more focused and determined, more sure than every that I can turn things around this week that my time was near. Then I hit the hill and the climb was a doddle because I had belief, I know i’m lucky to have Em fighting my corner, my family and friends behind me. And my dad watching me giving me a push when needed.

I arrived home, knackered but feeling good and ready to kick on.After a bit of a rest, i motivated myself. By the end of the day, I had submitted three job apps, done some prep for some more potential job opportunities, prepped for a buisness meeting tomorrow about the fundraising. All because my girlfriend refused to give up on me and then i kicked the arse out of a couple of hills on my bike.

So yes this may be a big week, it may not be, but now i’m ready for whatever it will bring.


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